I never thought a brief encounter from my teenage years would matter decades later. Then, one ordinary morning, my past appeared unannounced, in a way I never could have imagined.
I was 17 years old when I welcomed my twins.
At that age, I was penniless, exhausted, barely able to get through each day, and I still clung to school as an honor student as if it were the only thing that could save me.
My parents didn't see it that way.
They said I'd ruined everything. They told me I was on my own. Within days, I had no help and nowhere to stay.
My parents didn't see it that way.
In November 1998, I was juggling classes, two newborns, and every job I could find. The father of my children had asked me to have an abortion, so he wasn't part of the equation. Most nights, I worked the night shift at the university library.
The girls, Lily and Mae, were still wrapped against my chest in a worn scarf I had bought secondhand.
He lived on instant noodles and campus coffee.
It wasn't a plan, it was just a matter of survival.
I was juggling my studies.
That fateful night, it was pouring rain in Seattle when I left work.
I only had 10 dollars. It was enough for the bus and bread, enough to survive for about three days if I managed a little.
I left the library with a cheap umbrella, adjusting my scarf so the girls wouldn't get wet. That's when I saw him.
An old man was sitting under a rusty awning across the street. His clothes were soaked. He wasn't asking anyone for anything. He wasn't even looking up.
He was just sitting there, shaking so much it hurt to watch.
That's when I saw him.
I knew that feeling.
And before I could stop, I crossed the street.
Without thinking, I took the money out of my pocket and gave it to him.
“Please… Have something hot.”
Then he looked up, staring at me.
And for some reason, I asked, "What's your name?"
There was a pause.
Then, in a low voice, he said, "Arthur."
I nodded.
"Please... have something hot."
"My name is Nora," I added, and I also said my last name. I introduced my twin daughters, tilting them so Arthur could see them. He repeated my name once, as if he didn't want to forget it.
"Nora".
That afternoon I walked home instead of taking the bus, five kilometers in the rain, hugging my daughters so they wouldn't get wet.
When I got to my apartment, my shoes were soaked and my hands were numb.
I didn't want to forget it.
I remember standing there, staring at my empty wallet.
I thought she was a fool.
That he had made a mistake.
And that I couldn't afford to be nice.
***
The following years were not easy. She worked afternoons in a restaurant and evenings in the library. She slept when the girls slept, which was very little.
There was a woman in my building, Mrs. Greene, who changed everything.
"Leave these girls with me when you have a shift," she told me one afternoon.
I had been wrong.
I tried to pay him.
Mrs. Greene shook her head. “Finish your studies. That’s all.”
So I did, little by little, step by step.
Lily and Mae grew up in that small, run-down apartment, then in another one, and then in something a little better when I found a stable job as an administrative assistant at a small company.
It wasn't easy.
But for a while, it seemed enough.
I tried to keep it.
Twenty-seven years have passed. Now I'm 44. My daughters are adults.
Two years ago, somehow, life crushed me.
***
Mae became seriously ill at 25. It started out mild. Then it became complicated.
Doctor visits turned into treatments. Treatments turned into endless bills.
He worked longer hours, accepted extra jobs, and cut costs on everything.”
But even so, it wasn't enough.
I still felt like I was suffocating.
Life always found a way to drag me down.
***
That morning, I was sitting at my desk, staring at yet another overdue delivery notice, trying to figure out what I could be putting off.
At that moment, the door opened.
A man in a dark gray suit came in and headed to my cubicle.
"Are you Nora?" he asked, stopping beside me.
—Yes —I replied skeptically.
read more in next page