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I picked up the box, the letter, and my coat. Nobody stopped me.
Outside, the air smelled of rain. I held the box against my chest the way I had once held my final paycheck, like something rare and fragile.
For a while, I expected victory to feel brighter. It did not. The first weeks were filled with paperwork, nausea, and rooms that echoed with his absence. Marlene sent one letter through her attorney, then nothing else. Her brothers accepted their allowances and kept their distance. I kept the charity photograph on the dresser, not because I looked beautiful in it, but because I looked unguarded.
Some nights, I spoke to Russell as though he were downstairs making tea, about to ask whether I had eaten. I told him I was trying. I told him the baby kicked whenever rain touched the windows.
Months later, I stood in the kitchen of the house Russell had built. Sunlight stretched across the floor in long, gentle squares. One hand rested on my belly. The other held his letter, softened and worn at the creases.
“Exactly what you deserve,” I whispered.
I finally understood. Not the money. Not the marble. To be seen, completely and without conditions.
I placed the letter down and walked toward the window, ready for whatever came next.
That evening, I opened the old kitchen windows as wide as they would go. They sealed perfectly, but I wanted the scent of rain inside. I made peppermint tea and set one cup across from mine, foolish and comforting.
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